Reflections

The past couple of weeks, well... more like three or so weeks, have been rough. Nevermind running out of data at some point, that's another story,  but even if I had it, I wouldn't have had the time to write. Like I said, it was rough. So many thoughts and emotions flooded my brain, it was a bit overwhelming.

One of the things that happened (which got to me the most), was that my son had to go to the doctor. After that visit he was in so much pain and I could do absolutely nothing about it. I mean here is my little man crying until he has no tears left and I'm helpless. All I wanted to do was take his pain and lay it on myself, but we all know that's impossible. So there I was having to comfort a tall 2 year old boy and hold him like he was a 4 month old baby. Well... that's when he would let me even go near him. He didn't want me. He wanted his dad. I'm sure if you're a mother you will know how that feels. Yeah, like a knife in your heart. I think I've come to accept that my boy is definitely a daddy's boy.  Everything was reversed during this time. Like literally everything. I had to wake up at night to go hush him and put him back to sleep, eating and drinking took time and ALL the potty training done just went down the drain. I had to start from scratch. But thank God we have reached a sense of normalcy again!

So after the sleepless nights, when things got back to normal, my body was already used to not sleeping so when I needed to sleep, I couldn't.  So while everyone else is fast asleep  I'm up trying to find something productive to do. So I started knitting again. Well... attempting to. More often than not I had some major fails but as they say; you can't blame a girl for trying, right? One of the products was a scarf turned neck warmer because Mzo decided to take my needle out the wool and so everything unravelled.  I managed to get it back in, picked up the lost stitches but then everything was backwards and I didn't know how to fix it. I'm an amateur in knitting so I was totally clueless in what I had to do so I just cast off and decided to turn it into something else. The second product worked out ok.  My latest fail is actually from last night.  I had cast on too many stitches and, well, I ended up with a rectangularish square of sorts. Not gonna get anywhere with that... but... I will keep trying.

With all of that going on there's still the usual cooking and ironing and cleaning and keeping Mzo occupied (which was more work because he wanted more attention than usual) and and and... So it all took its toll on my body and this past weekend I just crashed. I came down with this massive cold and on Friday I only managed to cook then I headed to bed for the afternoon. Sabbath I didn't go to church because I was super drowsy and slept all day. Sunday was pretty much the same. Monday hubby had to go to work so I had to pick up on a lot so I still haven't recovered. All I wanted to do, all I still want to do is sleep. But alas, my bouncy boy is back in full swing and to him it's business as usual.  But the sweetest thing is that he is so observant. He can tell when I'm not feeling well and he will say "mama, phi?" Meaning mom where? This is him asking where it hurts. And then he says "yiza",  come. Then he takes my big head and lays it on his little chest and rubs my back. And then he says "up", as in get up. And in those few seconds my world becomes brighter.  I'm so blessed to have him around.

Trying to get my ducks in a row...

So, I'm sorry for the silence (to those who read my blog) but it hasn't been smooth sailing. Ideally I would like to write twice a week. One food blog and one anything else blog, so hopefully that will happen.  Here's to the road to recovery. Wishing to write more because so much more happened but I have porridge boiling on the stove and little guy just woke up so I have to go. We will catch up on #FabFoodFriday. Take care.